What do Other People Say About You
Do you wonder what other people say about you? Do you wonder what other people think about you? Do you really want to know?
This is a common compulsion. I call it a compulsion because no good will really come from it. It is one of those deceptive questions that can occupy your mind. It is one of those questions that does not need to asked. The real question you should be asking is, “What do you think about yourself?”
Suppose you could find out what someone is saying about you. Maybe it is complimentary. That will probably make you feel happy for a minute. It will not impact your life. It will not be earth shattering.
Suppose someone said some negative things about you. That will probably get a more intense reaction. You will probably want to correct them. You will want to defend yourself. You will have a judgement about how wrong and ignorant the other person is. You may feel hurt, angry, insulted. You may even agree with them and get down on yourself. It could alter your relationship with them and others. And they could be off base.
Should someone’s perception and opinion of you matter? I would say the answer to that would depend on how you react to this information. If you can step a back and look at it objectively then perhaps you can get some insight. If you are going to react and freak out then better you do not know. There will be no value to you hearing this info. It will put you on an emotional roller coaster.
So what do you say about yourself? What do you think about yourself? This is a deep question. Perhaps you have pondered it. Perhaps you have conditioned yourself to think poorly about yourself. Perhaps you are riddled with negativity. Perhaps you do not measure up to your own standards.
Is your perception and opinion accurate? Most likely not yet you live your life as it it were true. Can you be objective about yourself? Probably not.
So how do you get in touch with yourself, the real you?
The first way is to add some positive feedback to your conversations with yourself. If you can do that it will open a door to seeing yourself differently.
You need to start to weed out the untruths. These are things that you automatically think about yourself. An automatic thought is an unexamined thought. They can be positive or negative thoughts. Once they become automatic they are misleading thoughts.
You need to re create the image you have of yourself. Once you can examine the automatic thoughts you will start to see the image you have created of yourself. You need to let go of that image and start to put a new one in its place.
This new image will be one that is rich in complexities. If you can define yourself in four words you are missing out on a big part of yourself.
To learn more about this and to learn how to do this in minimal time please check this out.
Marcia, Your Confidence Coach
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